Smartphone, my ass

I remember when Igi bought his iPhone. Those were the days. He was so proud to be an owner of a small piece of new technology heaven. The euphoria lasted for about three days. They were blissful, those first three days. Almost like a honeymoon. He was surfing away, showing people clips of "Top Chef" on youtube and taking pictures and recording videos. He would whip his phone out at every concievable (and unconcievable) opportunity. I think the honeymoon period would have lasted considerably longer if he hadn't been the owner of a restaurant. But because that's what he is he quickly found out what the first iPhones (and all consecutive iPhones, come to think of it) were somewhat lacking in: the ability to work as phones. You know: the dial-and-then-magically-there's-someone-on-the-other-end. We began to hear rumbles of discontent. Musings over the fabulous phone-qualities of the old 3310 Nokias. One day, he snapped. The iPhone died on him in the middle of a very important call. "Get me a phone that works!". Said, and done. A Nokia. One that supposedly can be stomped on by an elephant without breaking.
I've got a smartphone too. Well. Smartphone, my ass. I just wrote a really long and funny blog post about a recent event, and because someone called in the middle of it, it's now gone. I might be joining Igi in the technology revolution of going backwards to what worked well - in true retro spirit. You know, keeping it simple, clean, efficient. Doing it's job with no extra bells and whistles. After all, that's the way I go when Mon Cher asks for a hamburger for dinner (no strange ingredients, no sacrilegious mayonnaise). So it it works for dinner, it must work for almost anything.

I just want a phone that works. That does what it advertises. That does NOT delete 3000 character texts just because multitasking is beyond the bloke that designed it. Please.