Why does everybody go wrong with roast chicken?

I swear to God (that would be a very special bottle of mine) that if another person asks me about why roasting a chicken is so bloody difficult then I'll probably pack it in for the next couple of months. If you're really wondering (and won't take my word for it) then British GQ asked Thomas Keller. Thomas Keller is opening up in Harrods (Knightsbridge, London. Not the hole-in-the-wall in Heathrow) and they thought it appropriate to give a good fourth of the article to roast chicken. Goodness.
Right. Well. Here it is: The meat is different in the breasts (whitemeat if you're Winston Churchill) and in the legs, so preferably they should be cooked in different temperatures for different periods of time. Also, the skin needs to be dry, because if it isn't, then it'll go slimy. Cue autumn tweaking: professional kitchens have an easy time with this, home kitchens not so much. That's why everybody goes wrong with roast chicken. Merci beaucoup.

If you wanted something else for autumn dinner that will probably always be wrong but can be pretty tasty all the same, check out the Guardian's list of edible bugs. Not coming to Bloom any time soon.